Closure & #HurtBae / by Christina Hairston

Hurt Bae, when I saw the title of this video pop up on my Facebook and the look of this young lady's face the peculiarity and curiosity caused me to hit play.  Little did I know that this video would actually spark an emotional response in myself. So I have to share this with you all! 

This video is TOO RELATABLE. 

No, I haven't been cheated on and shot a video for closure and posted it on Youtube and gone viral. I actually have not been cheated on that I know of (waiting for my day to go H.A.M) But what I found so relatable about this video was the hurt. Ladies we have all been here before. We've probably been here more than once. Okay, let's be brutally honest and admit that half of our relationships leave us feeling like this if we aren't the ones wanting to end it. 

I watched this video once straight through before reading any of the comments because I knew they would be very interesting... by interesting I mean either men trying to defend this man. And females feeling the hurt too. 

So I thought about myself, with just getting out of a relationship, "is closure necessary?"  

I hate to speak for anyone else, but I know that for me closure is a necessity. And if I don't feel compelled to have it then we really weren't in a serious relationship.  Something about knowing where we stand has always been important to me. It's an opportunity to get everything out. For some it's an opportunity to feel less guilty... Y'all know what I'm talking about. Either way, closure is whatever you need it to be for you and hopefully an opportunity to leave things on the table and walk away feeling better.

Now back to Hurt Bae:

 (I don't think she's dumb at all by the way)

(I don't think she's dumb at all by the way)

This video really got to me because it seems like this situation ALWAYS happens to the good girls. You know exactly what I mean, the type of girls who try to keep their guard up but when they let it fall, it falls. The type of girls that once it falls will do anything and everything for their man. The type of girls that every man says they are "lucky to have" as he says at the end of the video (That part really mad me mad y'all). 

This is a message for the good girls:

You know who you are, when you've been hurt over and over and feel like you've done it all right it's time to reflect. We all know what she really wanted to say when he asked her why she didn't just leave after she knew he was cheating on her. She said he was her best friend. She loved him. Being the good girl you are, I'm sure you gave him a chance, you let him do things you would never allow anyone to do to you, but because it was him you did.

When your relationship is going down hill It comes to a point that you have to acknowledge yourself. You have to acknowledge your worth and what you can accept. You should never accept being repeatedly cheated on, by anyone even when it's the person you love the most. If you're in that situation I really challenge you to acknowledge your worth.

In the words of my daddy,

"It's not about commitment, but its about the place a man is. They might not be looking for a life long partner. It's nothing new. Probably 8 out of 10 guys are not ready. Unfortunately in our society, thats how they tend to be wired. If you're interested in one woman you're old fashioned, or whipped. Something to always bring about negativity. Many young men don't know how to give up themselves and sacrifice who they are to be something better. When a relationship ends nothing is right or wrong. It's just a lesson. Everything in life has a purpose, So you  have to recall that purpose. your purpose and that you are going to be better. God has something better. Take the failure and mishap. Realize this is what I learned. That’s how you grow."

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Questions that need answers:

Do you think they should have made this video?

Should she have left him or tried to work it out?

If this was your friend what would you tell her?

If he was you friend what would you tell him?

How did you feel after watching it?

Theres many more questions that need answers, comment what you think!